Terrapin Tables

Bizarre Cartoon

Easier to follow with the subtitles on.

Worst (or best) babysitter ever.

I wonder how a defense can be made for this. Getting a 2 year old drunk? Neat.

x-mas baby

Just 'cause....

Time to make the casket.

For my dead homie.

Narnia Rap redux

Apparently is a "cultural touchstone" now.

Cell Phone Lozenge

It is sort of a shame that it didn't kill her. She remains in the gene pool.

Merry Christmas!

Just wanted to wish everyone a merry Christmas & Chanukah. I was going to please the masses of the website with a redesign, but it's proving to be rather difficult to get things to look the way I want, so it's going to be delayed until, oh, New Year's or so.

If it's not done by then, it may take me a while... I just found out I'm headed to Honolulu right after the new year, where I get to ride the USS Port Royal from Pearl Harbor to San Diego. That means seven days of no internet, no beer, and no TV (horrible rum stashed away in shampoo bottles might be my only hope). I think I may go crazy. Good thing Tijuana is waiting for me when I get off the boat (I scheduled a few days of relaxing after I get ashore).

Morans

Lest there was any doubt remaining after our internet pollution of the last few years, UMD students do some dumb, dumb shit. Now, it goes all the way to FARK. And this woman is 43 YEARS OLD. What kind of nonsense will we be pulling in 15-20 years?

Feels good to see all the spots from home talked about...Carderock, Greenbelt Target, the dumpster behind Wendy's...

Chronic of Narnia

Cupcakes!

Big Ups to Latvia

This article attempts to make the corollary that excessive drinking in Latvia amongst men is so prevalent that it leads to a life expectancy ten years below that of the women's average. I don't know how true that is, but this guy certainly represented - almost 1% moonshine in his veins. Perhaps he was very bad at beerpong.

In other news, I cannot say for a certainty where, exactly, Latvia is. I'm thinking, northeast of the Black Sea. Now I'm gonna look it up and see how far off I am.

Mr. Light Beer Inventor

The guy credited with inventing light beer passed away.

Fernet-Branca

I had never heard of this stuff until last week. Apparently it is popular in San Francisco, so maybe Chris can lend something to the discussion. Anyway, so of course I bought some.

Bored on a Saturday

Albers-style, here's a few sites that are a complete waste of time:

- A new level in nerdiness - vacuum cleaner hacking.

- It seems like the kind of thing I'd be into, but I don't even like regular ironing.

- In Norway, "stripping" is apparently a viable showcase for the high school talent show. It's good to be Norwegian.

- And finally, in the most grand of fashion, here's the greatest holiday flash animation ever. Make you sure you catch the end of the song: it's hilarious.

Merry Christmas, and remember it's true meaning. It's not about the gifts: it's about that mystical time of year when the ghost of Jesus rises from the grave to feast on the flesh of the living. So we all sing Christmas Carols to lull him back to sleep.

If you're male . . .

and you watch TV, I have to imagine you will find this funny. If you're female, I have no idea what you think is funny. I dunno, watching guys get hit in the groin with things? That seems to be in a lot of movies, and I certainly don't think it is all that funny. It has to be in there for some reason. My guess is to amuse women.

Beer Pong Table

For Sale at Spencer's.

How Great is This?

Antonio Brown

Even if you aren't a big football fan, this is a pretty good story.

Crazy Kids and Their Bar Mitzvahs

Having grown up in an area utterly devoid of Jewish people, I have never really been exposed to the Bar/Bat Mitzvah experience, so when I saw a teenage boy at the gym yesterday with a shirt that read "Paul's Xtreme Bar Mitzvah" and some date, I was intrigued. And then I saw this story in today's Washington Post. All I know is this, I sure as hell didn't have a party like that for my Confirmation. First you guys get to kill my Messiah, and then you get better coming-of-age parties. Stinks.

Gay cowboys . . .

. . . eating pudding.

Urbina

This story fascinates me. Amazing how other countries and cultures work. Depending on the outcome, I forsee a made-for-tv ESPN movie on this, sponsored by some company they will plug to no end.

Fatboy's New Blog

Well, for a bit of shameless self-promotion, I've started a new blog on my website. What that means for all you TT readers is that I'll try to keep all of my ranting/raving/evolution type posts over on that blog, so you won't have to see them, anymore. One of my first posts on my new blog was actually inspired from an old discussion on this site, How much money would it take for you to kill a puppy with your bare hands?

Rocky Spoof

The Eye of the Tiger.

Groening Vs. McFarlane?

There's been talk of a feud - or at least dislike - between the Simpsons camp and the Family Guy camp. As I hear it, McFarlane loves and praises the Simpsons, while Groening isn't exactly a fan. I'm sure RIck has all the info here, if there is any.

So, who saw tonight's Simpsons? They were in Italy and for some reason (not really watching) ther was a book of American criminals. Snake was "El Casa Invasiono" or something, Quimby was "el Drinko Dive-o." No big deal. Then, on the next page, was a pic of Peter Griffin titled "Plagiarismo." Then, Stan from American Dad, titled "Plagiiarismo de Plagiarismo." This nonsense was the only reference I could find, probably because it takes a special kind of retard to watch an episode and get right online to discuss it. Like me. I am that retard.

Anyway, seems like pretty harsh smack talk...discuss.

National Champs!!!

Woooooooo...National Champions! This is the greatest thin...oh, wait, sorry. It was soccer. Um, go spret, I guess.

Oh, there was something in the news about field hockey, too...

Run! It's the Media!

Oh no, even worse, it's a Nun! She's comin' right for us!

Just to make Roy jealous...

I am going to my friend Carrie's 30th bday party this weekend. She loves pirates. a lot. This was the evite...

"Mateys,

Grab your eyepatch and parrot to celebrate everyone's favorite wench walking the plank out of her 20's!!

The skull flag flies at the Washington Plaza Lounge. Carrie is in the dark on the theme so keep it under ye lids. Costumes encouraged (c'mon, it IS Carrie, costumes are always encouraged) but not required.

The party will go late (Pirates being Pirates) so when you are tired of eggnog and want to get a little captain in ya, sail on over."

So hooray!! I get to dress like a pirate this weekend!! 20 bucks says there will actually be a skull flag flying...

Stephen Colbert on NPR

For anyone who stays up the extra half hour to watch the Colbert Report after the Daily Show, Stephen Colbert was interviewed on NPR's Fresh Air yesterday. The interview is available at the NPR website. He was being pretty much himself (I assume), with a good portion of the interview covering his inspiration for the character he plays on the show. It was pretty interesting.

Web-only Family Guy episodes coming

So it looks like Family Guy will have web-only episodes coming out next year. They'll want to charge about $2 an episode, although I'm sure it will be free for those who know how to get it. Hopefully this is additional content, and not shows/ideas slated for regular TV release...

Oh, and this is mentioned in the article below, but while we're on the topic, it looks like Comedy Central's own internet video distribution site (Motherload) will have the 4 episodes of Chappelle's Show that were completed. Seems like ever since Apple got into the video distribution market (a whopping month ago with the relese of the Video iPod and charging $1.99 for TV show episodes online), internet video may really start to take off...

Chappelle's Show

"When he returned, however, that had not changed, according to his writing partner at the time, Neal Brennan. Brennan told Time that Chappelle would like an idea; it would be shot, but Chappelle would then say, "This sketch is racist, and I don't want this on the air."

'He was calling his own writing racist,' Brennan said."

The Jetty

So if you go to the Bud Light website, and if you click on the "Movie & More" link, and then "Bud Light the Movie" there are three items to watch. One of them says Easton. I am relatively sure this movie was at least partially filmed at the Jetty in Queen Anne's County. So see if you recognize anyone. From what I can tell, none of our parents are on there. Thank God.

My Website Finally Pays Off

Forget the pages where I try to educate people, the technical pages where I try to share my expertise, or even my political ramblings where I try to convince people to see things the same way I do. The page that really paid off on my website is the one where I explain how to fold a paper airplane from a Post-It note. The book publisher, Weldon Owen, has made a book titled, Post-It Notes: Ideas That Stick. Below are pictures of the front cover of the book, and the page spread that has my paper airplane.

The book officially goes on sale tomorrow. When I last checked, Amazon only had one copy left in stock, even though it didn't even have any pictures of it, yet. Who'd have thought that such a frivolous book would be so popular? Or maybe it's just all the contributors' families buying copies (just like when I went to see the Nutcracker here in Wichita Falls, you could tell that 95% of the audience was there just to watch somebody that they knew).

Update: I fixed the link to my website to point to the correct paper airplane page (yes, I had directions for more than 1 paper airplane on my site).

Missed opportunity

So I was watching The Boondocks on Adult Swim last night, which was about a guy not wanting to go to jail. If anyone else caught the show, you probably counted the phrase "I don't want to get anally raped" about 10 times in those 22 minutes. Clearly I should've put in ad time on Adult Swim.

Now I get it...

...this is why everyone hates white people. It all makes sense now.